Greyback's Christmas Ghost [Two-shot Fanfiction] FINISHED

Nevodeon · Geplaatst: Di Dec 25, 2007 23:31

A new story. I've been working on it for a very short while, but it's getting really long already. So I decided to place it in two parts. Maybe more.

I bet everyone's heard of the movie Scrooged, and all it's parodies. Well, this is a Greyback version ^^'

Halleluja, Greyback hates Christmas, surprise, surprise.
Anyway, here you go. I hope you enjoy, the second part is coming tomorrow.

Greyback’s Christmas Ghosts

‘Sod off, Malfoy! Get the hell out of my way, or I’ll blow you away!’ a man yelled. The man was huge, rather fat and he looked as though he hadn’t taken a shower in five months. His hair seemed beautifully white, but that was just snow. Christmas-time, Father Christmas, snow, the usual. Greyback hated it.
‘Well, fine then, but do not tell anyone I have not asked you, Greyback. If you choose to celebrate Christmas alone, I will not stop you,’ Lucius replied.
‘Good, then shoo. Christmas, Shmismas! What’s the bloody use of it, anyway?’ Greyback yelled, looking quite offended by the invitation. ‘It’s all for the damn money. Do I look as if I’ve money?’
‘You do not have to buy anything for anyone. It is just a little party and I would like my friends to come, so you too. Please, think about it, alright?’ Malfoy said. He nodded and walked out of the bar.
Greyback glared. What nerve. What the hell was wrong with Malfoy, he’s not a holly, jolly Christmas guy. He kills Muggles and kisses asses of people like the Minister for Magic and.. Well.. The Dark Lord..
He threw some sickles and knuts and the barkeeper. Ugly old mug. Greyback was a Christmas angel compared to that guy.
‘H-happy Christmas, sir?’ said the barkeeper, but not a second after he said it, he knew he shouldn’t have done it. Greyback raised his wand and blew up all the mugs and glasses. He burned the Christmas tree and threw the balls through the window. ‘Kiss my big, fat, hairy-’

Back home he stared out of the window. It was still snowing and kids were playing outside. As it turned darker and darker, he started to get hungrier and hungrier, so he decided to drink some rum and go to bed.
‘Christmas, yo ho and a bottle of rum,’ he sang and with a half-empty bottle of rum, he fell asleep on the couch.

In the middle of a beautiful dream, someone woke him up by coughing really annoying, but annoyed too. Fenrir blinked a few times. It was still dark, so he couldn’t see much. ‘Malfoy? That you? I told you, I’m not going. Stinking party.’
‘No, Mr. Greyback, not Mr. Malfoy this time,’ a slow voice spoke. Fenrir knew that voice. From somewhere.. Sometime.. Like, maybe on Hogwarts, or something. Not a reunion, right?
‘Who the hell are you.’
‘Do you not remember me, Wolfy?’
‘You do sound familiar, but I can’t really- Wait.. How the hell did you come in? I’m gonna report you, filth!’
‘Be silent, you fool. It is me, Goggles McSharpin.’
‘Goggles who? What kind of name is that?’
‘I did not come here to be offended by you. It is twelve o’clock and-’
‘And you dare to wake me up? Bloody hell, mate, you lost your mind?’
‘You really do not remember me?’
Fenrir thought. Goggles McSharpin. Goggles McSharpin.. Nope, nothing. He took his wand out and made a little light. Ooh, that Goggles McSharpin.
‘Aah, professor McSharpin, how are you these days. Still.. Dead? You got me kicked out of Hogwarts, y’know that? It’s your fault I became the Greyback I am.’
‘Oh, be silent, I have no time to pity you.’
‘I wasn’t asking you to.’
‘Good, because I am not going to.’
‘Fine.’
‘Fine! Now.. Wait.. Now I forgot. Where was I?’
‘You were about to tell me WHAT THE HELL YOU’RE DOING HERE!’
‘Oh.. Right. Well, I am a Christmas ghost now. And I am going to warn you. This night at one, two and three o’clock you will be visited by three ghosts.’
‘Halleluja, ghosts. Muggles are frightened by ghosts, McSharpin, wizards aren’t.’
‘Fine, it will be Vampires then, whatever you like.’
‘I like teddy bears.’
‘Will you finally shut your mouth and let me finish?’
‘But I want flying, pink teddy bears to visit me tonight.’
‘Shut up!’ McSharpin’s voice suddenly became loud and frightening, but Greyback grinned. ‘Anyway. Three ghosts, one, two and three o’clock. Christmas past, present and future. You probably know the story, right?’
‘Sure.’
‘Good. Then I will leave you alone with your self-pity. I sure hope to see you soon.’
‘Oh. Hay.. McSharpin? Could you do me a favour?’
‘What.’
‘Tell the teddy bears to bring toiletpaper. That’d be a great present. Thanks.’
A scream of anger was followed by a bang, and McSharpin was gone. So, it was a reunion after all. A reunion with the teacher he killed. Accidentally? Hell no.

Fenrir grinned and closed his eyes again. He finally fell asleep, but was woken up at one o’clock sharp. He opened his eyes and sighed. ‘Wou muss we the gwost of thingums paaaaast?’ Fenrir yawned.
‘Yes,’ said a cute, cuddly voice. ‘That is me.’
The voice kind of startled Fenrir, and he immediately took out his wand and made some light. On his foot-end sat a cute, pink teddy bear, with huge watery eyes. He looked so cute, Fenrir felt like kicking his-
‘You must be kidding me.. He actually send a teddy bear?’
‘Oh, for god’s sake, no,’ said the teddy and he turned into a man who looked like a muggle lawyer. A suit, a suitcase, a nice tie and very neat hair.
‘Okay, there’s no need for this. I’ve changed. I’m a lovable person now. I love Christmas. Halleluja. I love you too. I think I’m gonna find some mistletoe and hang it above us, if you know what I mean.
‘Well.. Problem solved then. Hold me hand and I’ll give you some mistletoe.’
Greyback seized the guy’s hand and the room changed. Bloody hell, the ghost got him. He must’ve been a really easy target for that ghost. Damn his stupidity.
‘Recognize this place, Fenrir?’
‘Sure, me old house, innit?’ Fenrir replied. ‘Nice place. Horrible father though. Know my first present I remember? A kick in the-’
‘Yes, I agree your father wasn’t a nice person.’
‘Can we walk through the wall?’
‘Give it a try.’
Fenrir glared at the ghost and walked straight at the wall. It came closer and closer and then all of a sudden. Bang! A bleeding nose. The ghost burst into laughter. ‘They always fall for it! Always!’ he laughed. A short minute later, he snapped his fingers and they were in the livingroom. A father was dancing around the Christmas tree with his daughter on his shoulders. The girl hardly really noticed. She stared at her big brother, who sat on the couch, burning sticks in the fireplace. But the father didn’t notice that, ‘cause he thought the girl was having fun on his shoulders.
‘Oh, yeah, that was a brilliant Christmas. He gave me a few twigs. You know what Di got? A broomstick. I know what you think, both wood, but I’m sure I had more fun with my present. I got to burn it and I accidentally burned dad’s trousers. Di flew against a tree and broke her leg. Poor girl. Only three years old, she was..’
‘She’s still alive, right?’
‘Yeah. He ain’t, though. He died a few years later. Glad to be rid of him. Old rug, he was.’
He stared at the little Fenrir. That wasn’t.. It was! He was crying! That can’t be true, Fenrir never cried in his life. ‘Hay, this isn’t true. I never cried in my life!’ Hm, deja-vu. Haven’t I said that before?
‘I think you did. Back then. Happy Christmas, little Fenrir.’ The ghost snapped his fingers again and the room dissolved. Fenrir and Diana sat around a hospital bed. ‘Father..’ Diana cried.
‘Fen.. Take care o’ y’r sister, will ya? I’ll haunt ya if she gets hurt or anythin’..’
‘Just talk to her, pops. She’s the one who loves you.’ Not a tear came from his face. On the other side of the bed was Diana, nearly drowning in tears.
‘Fenny, be nice. Daddy, you too. It’s Christmas.’
‘Yah, but I can’t stop dyin’, now, can I, Di? Can I?’
‘Daddy, don’t talk like that. You know I don’t like it when you talk like that.’
Fenrir and the ghost stared at Diana. She was so young, and she had to loose her father already. Young Fenrir really didn’t care. He obviously hated his father.
‘Di.. C’mere, girl. I want ya to know.. I love you.. And I’m so sorry for this and.. that.’ He nodded at young Fenrir, who lifted his eyebrows.
‘Daddy, don’t do that! Please, daddy..’
Mr. Greyback started whispering something in Diana’s ears. Greyback never actually knew what he said.
‘We’ll have to repeat that one..’ said the ghost and he snapped his fingers. All of a sudden, they were very close and they could hear every word.
‘Di. I’m really sorry. Tell your brother that.. Tell him.. Tell him that I’m sorry for the pain I gave him. That.. That I love him too. I never meant to hurt him.’
‘LIES!’ screamed the old Fenrir. ‘He’s just trying to comfort Diana. Hell, he hated me. He always said it was my fault mum died. If he loved me, my name is Goggles McSharpin.’ The ghost didn’t answer, but pointed at Mr. Greyback. Tears were streaming from his eyes. He really meant it. Fenrir’s heart broke.
‘Pleased to meet you, Goggles.’ Said the ghost.
Fenrir didn’t answer. He stared at the tears. Then he closed his eyes. He heard fingers snap, and he was back in his room.
‘Why are you doing this? I’m not gonna change. Kay, dad loved me, so what? Screw him.’
‘Fine, don’t change. Yet. There are two more ghosts waiting, Fenrir.’
‘The name’s Greyback. Sod off, Ghost.’
He lay down on his bed. Bloody ghosts. He was just gonna ignore the next one. Who would arrive in.. Five, four, three, two….

Nevodeon · Geplaatst: Wo Dec 26, 2007 22:01

Who would arrive in.. Five, four, three, two, one.
Fenrir didn’t hear anything. Maybe the ghosts forgot about him. Maybe they just didn’t care. He was probably worse than the guy from the story. Unless he skipped the part about the man ripping out hearts of little children.
He opened his eyes. Come on, where was the ghost. ‘Finally awake, are you?’ said a happy female voice. A deep sigh came from Fenrir’s mouth.
‘Come on, Fenny Penny Schnenny Wennyrenny. It can’t be this bad. I’m the ghost of Christmas pre-’
‘Yeah, present, I expected you. So.. What d’you wanna show me. A kid I bit? A guy I nearly killed? My own family? Malfoy’s party? Teddy bears?’ Fenrir took out his wand and called for a Lumos.
‘No, no, yes, yes, no. That’s two out of five! Hurray for you!’
He saw a jolly, sprout-like witch, raising her hand for a high five. She was small, round and green. Not only her clothes, her face was green too.
‘Nice tan,’ said Fenrir, rather cranky, but the ghost burst in to giggling. ‘Nobody told me you were so funny! Well, anyway, let’s go, we’ve got a lot to see,’ said the ghost. She gave him her hand and the room dissolved.
Next thing he knew, they were standing in a very joyful house. Christmas lights, a huge tree, red and green everywhere. The green seemed to cheer the ghost up even more, because she stood next to some green and made a picture of herself. ‘That’s going in the yearbook,’ she giggled, and she gave Fenrir a fast wink. He wasn’t really paying attention.
‘Ah. Your sister and brother?’
‘Soon to be brother-in-law. They’re engaged.’
‘Oh, congratulations.’
‘He’s American.’
‘Oh. Well, that’s not bad, is it?’ Fenrir glared. ‘Anyway. Diana invited you, right?’
Fenrir nodded and stared at Diana en Hugh. They were obviously having a good time, though Diana would be more pleased if Fenrir were there.
‘Ay, why couldn’t he come? C’mon, even though he hates Christmas, he can still drop by ‘n have a good time, right? I mean.. He ain’t Santa, but hay, he can have a good time too.’
‘He hates Christmas. Father never actually gave him presents. Twigs and paper. He once actually gave a sheet of toilet paper. Used.’
Hugh burst into laughter and Fenrir nearly flew at him. ‘You can’t touch them, they can’t hear you. I wouldn’t try,’ said the ghost.
Diana wasn’t pleased either. She glared at Hugh and then walked straight to the window. ‘I keep hoping he’ll drop by anyway. Christmas would be such a better time if he’d enjoy it. The man he hated died on Christmas, so there must be something cheerful for him.’
‘Come on, Di.. Y’can’t stay here all day. Let’s just try ‘n have a good time, kay?’
They started snogging.
‘Kay! That’s not what I came here for! Geez, I don’t have to see this, do I. Or will this teach me something too?’
The ghost snapped her fingers and they were in Malfoy Manor. A lot of happy Christmas music, laughter and Christmas joy made the house a lot nosier than the previous. It didn’t really cheer Fenrir up. But then he saw something that made him want to go there. Rum. They had rum. It was probably for him, just in case.
‘My rum. Me wants,’ said Fenrir with a grin, but the ghost snapped her fingers and the rum disappeared. Nobody seemed to notice.
‘Whose present is the last one?’
‘It’s Greyback’s. He might still come,’ Malfoy replied.
‘C’mon, Lucius, don’t be too hopeful, he probably fell asleep on the couch with a bottle of rum in his hands.’
The whole lot laughed.
‘Well, yes, we all know he loves rum, that is why I bought a bottle for him. But he would probably have it finished in two minutes, maybe three,’ said Malfoy.
Everyone laughed again.
‘Nice lot. ‘s That how they think of me? And they expect me to go there?’
‘You could go to change their point of view.’
‘But they’re right. I did fall asleep on the couch with a bottle of rum in my hand.’
‘Well, why are you so upset then?’
‘They’re not supposed to know that!’
‘They guessed.’
‘Good point. You’re smart. I want the previous ghost, he wasn’t.’
‘Hihi, the teddy bear?’
‘Yeah, that one. He looked like a bloody Muggle.’
‘Muggles can be nice.’
‘Kay, send me home, I’ve changed, shoo, lemme celebrate Christmas with my friends.’
‘Really?’ she asked excited.
‘No,’ he answered grinning. ‘Not that smart after all.’
The ghost snapped her fingers and Fenrir was back in his living room. A next ghost was sleeping in his couch. He was huge, fat, and an enormous bubble came from his nose. This is a one in a lifetime experience. Peeing over a ghost.
He took a few steps and then took his thingums out. The ghost woke up immediately. ‘I wouldn’t do that, if I were you. Think about your future.’
Fenrir grinned. ‘I s’pose you’re gonna show me that?’
‘Me? Why should I?’
‘Well, you’re the Christmas ghost of future, aren’t you?’
‘Am I? I forgot.’
‘No, you’re actually a flying, pink teddy bear and you were about to leave this place.’
‘Oh, well.. Okay, if you say so.’ He tapped Fenrir on the shoulder and smiled. They were suddenly in Diana’s house. The couch was removed. It was replaced by a huge tomb, a few people circled around it. Uncle Thomas was there. And Hugh. Malfoy was there too, but he didn’t seem to care.
‘Oh, that’s me, I suppose? I’m dead?’
‘You seem alive to me.’
‘I mean the guy in the tomb. Hell, first day?’
Fenrir stepped at the tomb and his heart stopped beating. It wasn’t him. It was Diana. It was her who died.
Suddenly the door broke open. There was Fenrir, not much older. ‘Diana!’ he yelled and he stormed at the tomb.
‘Get the hell out of here, half-breed. It’s your fault she’s gone!’ Hugh whispered.
‘What.. What do you mean, Jones?’
‘If you’d have come to walk with her, she’d still be here!’
‘Shut up, fool. What happened.’
‘Trashed by a tree.’
Nobody spoke. Hugh slowly took out his wand. His eyes were spitting fire. ‘Get out.’
Fenrir glanced at Malfoy. ‘Do something, Malfoy, c’mon,’ but Malfoy shook his head.
The ghost snapped his fingers and they were at a cemetery. There was a man crying on a grave. ‘Why? Why you, why not me?’ the man yelled.
Fenrir walked closer and saw himself crying. He look at the gravestone. She died two years from now, as he read.
The ghost snapped his fingers again and they were back at Fenrir’s house. There was a fat man, lying on his couch. Only one man was looking at him. Malfoy.
‘So this must be me. Look at all my friends. Yeah, I’m sort of a objectors item for a lot of people. Friends! Get them all!’
Malfoy spoke.
‘You fool. You went insane after your sister died. You should not have stayed on the cemetery. The Dark Lord will not be pleased. Who will have to tell him? Yes, me, indeed.’
‘Fool. He only thinks of himself. Oh dear, Dark Lord’s gonna punish me, help me, help me. And he wants me to come to his party.’
The ghost snapped his fingers once more and Malfoy and the dead Greyback disappeared. The house was burning, but Fenrir didn’t feel any pain. This was probably a few months later.
‘Next day.’
Next day.
‘Next day?!’
‘Yes, next day. Shocking, isn’t it. They didn’t want to be remembered of you, so they burned everything that could remind them of you.’
‘How nice. Now, snap your fingers.’
The ghost snapped his fingers and the house wasn’t burning anymore. Fenrir took a seat on his couch.
‘Well, very nice, all this. I’ll remember to take that walk with Diana in two years. Anything else?’ He grabbed his coat and opened the door. ‘I think you can get out yourself?’
He stepped outside and closed the door, glanced at his watch and saw it was only eight o’clock. The ghosts lied about the time. One, two and three am, my-

A knock on Diana’s door. She looked at Hugh and a huge smile appeared on her face. She ran at the door, opened it and gave her brother a huge hug. ‘You made it.’

They had a few hours of fun. Yes, even Greyback had fun. At ten o’clock, the three of them moved to Malfoy’s Manor, and the party went on. This was the best Christmas ever. Happy happy joy joy, hallelujah.

Wrong! He thought he shouldn’t’ve gone. He was bored all night, but the rum helped him through. Maybe he had a little laugh, but not much. Hay, he wasn’t Father Christmas. But at least he pleased a few people, and that made his heart grow a little. Ah well, a little bit of Christmas fun is alright, right? He’d do it again next year.